It is quite likely, actually it’s an almost certainty, that by now you have seen the internet sensation that is Rebecca Black. Since it was uploaded to Youtube in February the 13 year olds song “Friday” has been seen by 69,665,519 people (as of writing). It is, quite frankly, an astounding number when you consider just how painfully bad the song actually is.
Now, I don’t claim to be a music critic but, as the popular expression goes, “I don’t know art but I know what I like”. And, unfortunately, Black’s song is low on my list of likes. But, that is exactly the appeal. Everything about the song is so excruciatingly bad that we just can’t help but watch, like drivers slowing down to catch a glimpse of some horrific car wreck.
The song and its accompanying video were made by ARK Music Factory for $2,000, paid for by Black’s parents. The resulting effort was a song about a young girl’s plans to enjoy herself on a Friday night. So far, so good.
The first sign of tragedy comes from the lyrics. Such zingers as “Kickin’ in the front seat, sittin’ in the back seat, gotta make my mind up, which seat can I take” and “Yesterday was Thursday, today is Friday, tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes after...wards” come across more as the rambling incoherent thoughts of a mental patient than classic lyrics.
The next sign of the apocalypse comes from that video. While initially seeming quite ordinary you’ll notice the cracks start to appear when Black, agonising over that eternal dilemma of where to sit, is picked up for school in a convertible driven by kids who don’t even look old enough to drive a Little Tikes push car. Cue embarrassingly funny teenage dancing, subpar Photoshop style graphics and an inexplicable, and unnecessary, rap verse.
All this comes together into a quite hilarious package. Well, I thought at the time, that was good for a chuckle, now onto more pressing matters. It seems, however, not everyone saw the video as a funny and, ultimately, completely innocent piece of media. Instead, some saw it as their opportunity to personally attack a 13 year old girl.
Now, admittedly, I have been quite mean so far. However, my meanness relates to the shocking writing and shoddy production of a song and video released into the public domain. What 13 year old girl doesn’t dream of having her own music video where she sings and dances along with her friends? As far as I was concerned, yeah the singing is bad and auto-tuned to high hell, but why not let the teenager have her fun and move on with our lives.
A huge group of Youtube users disagreed. One comment said “I hope you cut yourself, and I hope you’ll get an eating disorder so you’ll look pretty”. One Twitter user commented, “Rebecca Black should be shot” while a fellow user wrote “Rebecca Black, I will personally go find you and rip out your vocal cords”. All clever and amusing reactions I am sure you will agree.
For me, the response has been more worrying than the song itself. Criticism is fair enough but outright hatred seems too far. It is sad to think that hundreds of thousands of people, many of who are adults, have taken to their keyboards to express their vitriolic hatred for a teenage girl.
And what would the alternative have been? Let us say, for example, we had all watched the video, laughed ourselves silly for 3 minutes and 48 seconds and ignored the button labelled “respond to this video”. What would have happened then? Most likely, we would all be less red faced and angry at the fact that a 13 year old girl is singing a song, how fucking dare she, about a day of the week. Eventually, the excitement would have died down and some new video, a woman head butting a cat presumably, would have taken its place.
So, where have the threats against Black’s life and vocal cords gotten her? On numerous television and radio shows including The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, that’s where. Instead of running the girl into the ground the public’s reaction has instead given Black a nice topic of conversation for talk shows and made her a media darling. She has even won praise for donating part of the songs profits to the relief effort in Japan and counts Chris Brown and Simon Cowell among her fans (although the less said about those two the better).
And now Black stands on the brink of success. Although it is unlikely that she will receive this amount of attention again in her career she has at least done one thing; used the abuse facilitated by internet anonymity to create a profile for herself and gain her song almost 70 million hits. And for that I say fair play. Even if the song is shit.Also in the news:
- Libya's Foreign Minister, Moussa Koussa, defected to Britain on Wednesday. Koussa has long been suspected of orchestrating the terrorist attacks perpetuated by the Libyan government in the past. During the 80's and 90's he even gained the nickname "envoy of death". Koussa has claimed he is no longer willing to serve the Gadaffi regime, while the Libyan government claim he is only in Britain on a diplomatic mission. There is no indication so far that Koussa will recieve immunity but it is very likely he will be made comfortable and given tight security in an effort to secure the defection of more officials.
- Joseph Ntshongwana, a former South Africa rugby player, has been arrested for the murder of three men in retaliation for the gang rape of his daughter. Ntshongwana is alleged to have followed the men for several days before attacking them with an axe. One of the victims had his head decapitated and dumped in a bin. A fourth victim, Khangelani Mdluli, escaped, telling police Ntshongwana had approached him saying "You think im stupid. You infected my daughter with HIV". Police in Durban were unable to confirm whether the motive was true, with a police spokesman saying "He has not officially admitted that to the police. It was a statement raised by one of the victims. We do not have any substantial evidence of a rape charge levelled by the suspect's daughter".
- Did you know?...Today is April Fools Day. Which means the newspapers break out their usual deluge of "hilarious" faked stories. The Guardian decided to do an historic about-turn and open a blog to cover the upcoming Royal Wedding. The Sun decided to report that gorillas were being given iPads in order to stay alert. The BBC reported that a group of fathers were to launch a gender discrimination suit against popular web forum mumsnet. And The Daily Mail went for "TWO MUSLIM COUNCILLORS REFUSED TO CLAP WAR HERO". What do you mean that was printed in February? Another case of Daily Mail scaremongering you say? Oh, right.
